Buying a house with your partner: Tips for buying the perfect house for both of you

Buying a house with your partner: Buying a house can be a stressful process; but when you throw two different opinions into the mix, it can be extremely exhausting.

Maybe you’re dying for a nice house in the suburbs; but perhaps your husband loves the idea of a large piece of land … Such disagreements can create obstacles on your way to the perfect house.

Follow these tips and buying a house with your partner shouldn´t be a problem! 😉

buying a house with your partner

Tips for buying a house with your partner

Since popular housing markets experience times shorter than average, don’t let a blockage with your partner make you miss the opportunity to buy the house of your dreams. Take a look at these tips to make the task of buying a house with your significant other easier.

Both can make a separate list of search parameters

List with 10 characteristics and 10 wishes

If you are buying a house with your partner, the best thing you can do is find out what you and your partner have in common. It is recommended that each person make a list with 10 essential features and 10 wishes.

Amber Gunn, a real estate agent, prefers couples to make lists separately; and if they don’t have at least five equal things in the list, she makes them make another list, but this time with 20 items. All this in order to find five things in common that are really important to both.

Make your own list and have your partner do the same

Start making your own list, and have your partner do the same. Compare the lists and identify the characteristics of the home (location, number of rooms, large backyard, among others) that are important to both.

These agreed features will serve as a basis for your housing purchase discussion. When you and your partner begin the search for the home in a similar territory, you will be more likely to get involve later.

buying a house with your partner

Leave emotions outside the budget

Couples looking for a home usually don’t agree when it comes to how much money they should spend on the house, according to a Facebook survey.

Should you wager on a higher mortgage to get your dream home? Or should you go the conservative way?

Do your best to get the feelings out of the equation and see the facts for yourself

Your monthly payments shouldn’t be more than 25% of your total income. Forget about any house that doesn’t fit within that price range.

Don’t trap yourself imagining vacations and family gatherings in a huge and extravagant kitchen. A house won’t be yours forever if it is out of your price range.

For example, Jessica R. fell in love with the most expensive house. And she thought it was still in her budget range; while her husband was betting on a house that was about $ 10,000-20,000 less.

They bought the most expensive house but only lived in it for a year before renting it. Despite being approved for the loan amount, Jessica realized after moving that house payments were too high. As time passed, the house began to consume every penny.

Eventually she and her husband had to sell it, learning a hard lesson in the process. “If our home had been affordable, we could have been able to keep it and at least enjoy our first home for over a year,” he explained.

By eliminating your emotions from the decision, you will be able to choose a home that you and your partner will enjoy for years to come.

buying a house with your partner

Get ready to postpone the search

If you and your significant other don’t agree on the search parameters, take a step back. There will always be new houses for sale, but insisting on a buying process in which one of the two disagrees, will only create a greater division between you and your partner.

Gunn often advises couples who have troubles finding common parameters in taking a break of two weeks and then rejoining.

It’s not worth ruining your marriage for a house.

Commitment is the key to finding something that fits your two needs. When Jenny J. was looking for a home with her husband, she focused on three things during the search: needs, budget, and relationship. If couples do not prioritize these things: “you’d better be single again and buy a house on your own.”

Take a break if it’s necessary

So if you and your partner can’t agree on a house, take a break. Make a pact that doesn’t include discussion of locations; the square quantity; the price; and so on for at least a couple of weeks. Then both can return to the discussion with a new perspective.

buying a house with your partner

Let your real estate agent be your mediator

A quality real estate agent can hear your housing disputes and help close the gap between you and your partner. With his intimate knowledge of the market, an experienced agent can provide healthy and wise advice.

Gunn has a lot of experience helping couples who want different things from a home. She jokes, “We are counselors, that’s how our second job is,” explains Gunn, who makes every person feel heard, relieves tensions and finds a solution that works for everyone.

buying a house with your partner

Don’t let a stressful situation like buying a house cause conflicts between you and your significant other. Turn to the help of a trusted real estate professional can allow you to find a home that meets the basic requirements or needs of both.

We hope you found these tips for buying a house with your partner useful. And you? How was your experience buying a house with your significant other? Would you add any other recommendations to the list?


Dave Ramsey. Married And House Hunting: How to Agree on The Perfect Home. Retrieved from:


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